Can focusing daily on habits you want to change about yourself cause more harm than do good?
If you’re like me, you jumped on the future-self journaling bandwagon within the last two years. The style of journaling was popularized by “Instagram-psychologist” the.holistic.psychologist (THP), Dr. Nicole LePera. The format invites room for growth + change by allowing you to visualize + write about a future version of yourself: a better, brighter, less anxious version of you. For thirty days, you take a habit you’d like to become more aware of + alter. You create affirmations around the behavior, envision future scenarios where you can respond differently, + contemplate how this future-you will feel.
The benefits of journaling are numerous; it can help reduce symptoms of depression, enhance your self-awareness, offload stress, increase your gratitude, + much more. I’m a big proponent of journaling, but if you turned to writing as a means to alleviate your anxiety, I’m not sure the use of daily future-self journaling is helpful. Hear me out!
After several months of following THP’s format, something felt off to me. I started to feel like this daily focusing on patterns I wanted to fix wasn’t leaving me much room for self-compassion or self-love. Rather than learning to accept myself as is – while still creating awareness around behaviors I wanted to shift – I became hyper-focused on what needed to be fixed next. As someone with anxiety, it was easy to get sucked into the dark hole of worrying + over-thinking + over-analyzing. I also wasn’t learning real-world techniques to be aware enough in each moment of anxiety to calm myself back down. Not to mention, so much forward-thinking left me feeling like my anxiety had actually worsened. After months of using the future-self journal, I began to feel like I was failing at “healing” because I wasn’t making progress quickly enough.
THP also created this journaling tool as a means for people to heal themselves (#selfhealers). I’m a huge advocate for taking your health into your own hands, but I think we still need the support of others – professionals, friends, a true community – not just a hashtag to follow. A Vice article from August 2020 called into question the harm THP may be potentially causing. She encourages “doing the work” all on your own + has previously shown disapproval for talk therapy.
So what to do? Well, the choice is still yours. Maybe the future-self journal works wonders for you. But if you’re like me + it leaves you with lower self-esteem + more anxiety than you began, it may be time to try something new. I also cannot advocate enough for seeking personal, professional mental health. (And of course, the cost + barriers to that for most is a conversation for another day.)
If you look back through my work, you can find the “selfhealers” hashtag. I drank the Kool-Aid + I placed THP on a pedestal. I considered editing my past work to reflect the change of heart I’ve had. But my hope is that other people will learn from the mistake I made. Question who you follow + trust. Do their methods REALLY work for you? It’s ok to change your mind.
The future-self journal gifted me with the practice of daily journaling. And I cannot recommend journaling enough! I still find value in this style of journaling – some of the time. It’s powerful to write a letter to yourself 5-years from now + envision all the wonderful changes you created.
Now, however, I’m more focused on being fully present in the here + now. I want to foster self-love + celebrate who I am along this healing journey TODAY. If that feels more your speed, please check out the Me Here Now Journal that I created. I hope this mindful + present journaling technique helps you learn to become better in touch your body + listen to your needs as well as love yourself along the way.